The last time I played basketball was here at this playground over 15 years ago. I’m at an old rec center called The Water Tower, and I may have been about fifteen or sixteen years old at the time. When I first moved to this part of Philly, I would come here since it wasn't that far of a walk.
Playing ball was all I did outside, because that's what everybody else was doing; either riding bikes, or playing basketball. It really was life, as they say. We all wanted to be like A.I.(Allen Iverson) with our headbands, and fly gear for the court. 🏀
It was around this time, however, when I realized that this game was not for me. I only ”played” because it was what I “knew.” My handle wasn’t very sharp, but I tried. Some days I could hit every shot; while on others, I couldn't do anything besides stand in the way. Simple acts like performing layups never really clicked for me.
Thinking back now, it was tough to find an identity here. Jumping on a trend was not my style, and eventually I retreated to my room, living out the remainder of my adolescent years on Xbox Live. I dropped all team sports & activities, never to pick them up again. 🏀
These days I’m in relatively good shape, and could see myself doing well at track, or soccer; maybe even wrestling. Starting an activity can be very challenging if it’s your first time. If you see others taking their own first steps, encourage them just for showing up.
There was one time during my freshman year of college where I tried out for the track team. Although I hadn’t run in a very long time, I wanted to join the team and meet people. I didn't know anyone else on campus, so it seemed like a good way to build friendships, while getting into shape. For some reason I really identified with wanting to be a runner during this time. It may have been because of all the praise HBCU track stars tend to receive.
Anyway, we started this drill running up and down a hill. After about 10 minutes or so, I began to get bad shin splints. The pain was rather unfamiliar to me, turning my gait into a hobbling wobble. The coach said things like "YOU READY TO QUIT YET?” I could only walk by now, eventually needing to limp all the way back to my dorm room. I remember him mouthing more nonsense as I left. When I got back to the room I felt so embarrassed for not completing the try out. It made me feel like a failure. 😔
From that incident, I developed a phobia of working out in front of other people. Whether it was running on the treadmill, or doing a push up at the gym. It's funny to think now how much more comfortable I’ve become exercising anywhere these days. Sometimes I’ll find myself shadow boxing in the aisles of a supermarket.
When I encounter anyone beginning a new journey, I take my time and try to answer any questions they might have. There were times at the gym when people would ask about equipment, or other things that may seem trivial to someone who’s been in the space for a while.
Comments on the internet can make you feel bad about yourself too, so only read the good ones. We all have been new to something at some point. There is nothing to be gained from being abrasive, or gatekeeping.
A great quote from brother El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz:
“Don't be in a hurry to condemn because he doesn't do what you do, or think as you think; or as fast. There was a time when you didn't know what you know today.”
I captured these images to test out my new Fujifilm setup (Portra 400). The rest of the evening I spent messing around with the footage I recorded. This playground happens to look very nice during the golden hour. The lighting made everything seem as if the shadows were adding their essence to the scene.
In the end, encouraging others who are only trying to better themselves does not require that much effort. A simple thumbs up could be all that is needed to pull somebody back into the game when they were just about to quit. Our own individual drive is what will ultimately keep us pushing forward. I am happy to say that I’ve completed my first marathon since then, coaching myself through to a quality performance.
